How to fight negative self talk

Fight.

Counter every negative thought with a positive rebuttal.

I woke up today and every thought that comes through my head is negative. Stuff like, of course my tire is almost flat and I need to fill it up. Wow that person is avoiding eye contact with me because they think I’m a douchebag. Or I hate all my clothes. That guy walking is dog looks like a real douchebag. That person driving a nicer car than me must be some kind of rich entitled generational wealth asshole.

So I was told in my meetings that I’m only responsible for my second thought and my first action.

I can’t control my first thought. But I can control my second thought. I can control my first action that comes from my thinking.

So for every thought that starts with of course the coffee grounds that you just ground are going to go every where but the coffee basket and spill all over the counter and get on the floor and then the coffee grounds are going to stick to the bottom of your bare feet and you’re going to track coffee grounds all over the house. Of course that is going to happen. That’s a whole train of thought. But it’s the first train of thought that came through my head as I was grinding coffee and attempting to get the coffee grounds into the filter basket. (Why does it seem like some days the coffee grounds fly out of the grinding cup in every direction except down? It’s like they the basket is a the same magnetic polarity and they fly away from it?)

So this train of thought just flies through my head and I can feel the negative rush of emotion coursing through me in response.

Here’s where I can actually do something. Pause.

Say to myself, whew boy it’s that kind of day, huh?

Okay now we fight and parse through that whole line of thinking and say so what to everything.

So what if the coffee grounds go everywhere but the basket. I can grind more. I can then clean off the counter. I can then sweep up the grounds that got on the floor. So what if some of the grounds got on my bare feet I’m about to take a shower anyway. So what if it seems like the coffee grounds are negatively reacting to the filter basket, some days it just is that way.

I’ll be honest this process of fighting is exhausting, especially when it goes on all day. And on these types of days I need to make my life easier in every way I can. I need to wear simpler clothes, like pants with a zipper fly instead of button. Because I’m going to be drinking a lot of water and going to the bathroom a lot and zipping up a fly is easier than a button fly. Looser shirt that doesn’t need to be tucked in, so that I’m not worrying about the back of my shirt riding out of my pants all day. I need to compensate for all the extra mental energy I’m going to be exerting fighting my negative self talk by making the things I can control easier.

On days like this, where every car seems like it’s riding my ass I’m going to plan a long run. I look forward to that time because usually when I’m running my focus can be just on that or on the podcast I’m listening to. There’s just less room for negative thoughts when I have a task to focus on.

I should also try and go to bed earlier. I can also give myself grace when I end up staring at my phone at the end of the day mindlessly scrolling.

It’s a battle and some days are just like this and it’ll pass. This too shall pass.